Trayvon Martin’s mother Sybrina Fulton is remembering her son as she marks 10 years since her life changed forever.
Her 17-year-old son was visiting his father’s fiancée at her townhouse in Sanford, Fla. On the evening of Feb. 26, 2012, Trayvon went to a nearby convenience store to pick up Skittles and a can of Arizona Iced Tea.
As he walked back to the townhouse, another resident, George Zimmerman, saw him and called 911. Although he was told not to follow the boy, Zimmerman confronted him. During the altercation, Zimmerman fatally shot Trayvon in the chest.
The shooting led to protests around the country that continued for months. Zimmerman, then 28, said that he was defending himself under Florida’s “Stand Your Ground” laws. He was acquitted of murder charges in July 2013.
While Trayvon’s death sparked a nationwide movement that continues to this day, Fulton still deals with her raw emotions, 10 years later. She has written an essay, titled Trayvon: Ten Years Later, that is available on Amazon, People reports.
According to People, Trayvon Martin’s mother Sybrina Fulton speaking with the tabloid, opens up about the night that changed her life — and how she still misses her son.
PEOPLE: A lot has happened in the past decade. What stands out to you the most?
Fulton: I think about all the things that have happened — from meeting President Obama to talking to other families who have gone through the same thing. It’s gratifying that Trayvon is remembered and is part of making a change, but I would give it all up to have him back. Nothing good that has happened can make up for the fact that I lost my son.
PEOPLE: In your essay, you say that you still cry every day.
Fulton: I do. I can be going along with my day just fine, and then something will happen. They’re called triggers: You hear something or see something that reminds you, and the emotions come back. I have days that are easier and days that are harder. I miss Trayvon, and I’ll miss him every day of my life.
PEOPLE: So how do you deal with that?
Fulton: Self-care is so important. There are days where I just sleep, or watch a movie, or go shopping or to the beach. Or I’ll pray. I’ll see a friend. I’ll do something to take my mind off of things. And now 10 years later, I realize that it’s okay. I can have some time where I take care of myself.
PEOPLE: So how have you personally changed?
Fulton: Before this happened, I had a good life. I had a good job, I was happy. I had my sons. I had friends. I had a lot of great things in my life. And when this happened, I thought that life was over. And I went through a lot of very tough times afterwards. People would tell me how strong I was, and I appreciated that, but I only became strong because Trayvon made me strong. The situation made me strong.
PEOPLE: Do you talk to other moms of African Americans who are killed, whether it be by police or by civilians?
Fulton: I do. I talk to as many of them as I can. I have had to struggle with some guilt if I can’t talk to everybody. But I’ll set aside time to have those conversations.
PEOPLE: And do you share a bond?
Fulton: Yes. A lot of people say, “I know how you feel because I lost a grandmother.” And I’m not taking anything away from their loss. I’m sure they’re grieving. But no, it’s not the same thing.
Unless you have had a child at the beginning of their life, who is murdered by senseless gun violence, it’s not the same thing. But when I talk to other mothers who lost their kids, I know that they understand my pain and my grief.
PEOPLE: So what’s next for you?
Trayvon Martin’s mother Sybrina Fulton: I want to do my part to help end senseless gun violence. If there’s anything good that can come out of what happened to Trayvon, it’s that people are more aware. And maybe that can make a difference.